Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Are affairs the new norm????

It seems these days you can't turn on the television, pick up a magazine, or read a newspaper that doesn't have a story about infidelity. Another celebrity or politician caught in an affair. The statistics are staggering, so much so that it seems that as a society we just accept it. The discovery of an affair for us makes good news, it makes the covers of magazines, and in my opinion, it diminishes how tragic this scenario really is.

I think it's more rare to hear about a marriage that hasn't been affected by infidelity. How did we get here? Are affairs more and more common, or is it that they are just being exposed more now?

I started this blog because I used to think that my marriage was going to beat the statistics. Six months ago I found out it didn't. Over the last six months I have listened to the same apologies, the same excuses, the same ol story that every adulterer gives to the person they hurt in some lame attempt to justify their actions. I've read so many books, online articles, even sought counseling from a marriage therapist. What I feel that I'm starting to realize is that none of these help me with the anger I have. There is no excuse for infidelity! It's not fair to find out that your spouse slept with another person and then be expected to forgive them, to accept their excuses, and then scour over where you must have went so wrong that your spouse had to look outside the marriage.

I'm angry that no one seems to step up and says it's okay to be completely pissed off about your spouse's affair. As someone that has been crushed by the discovery of her husband's infidelity, I'm saying I'm pissed off and I'm not scared to say it!

As I continue this blog I will reveal more details of my story. How I feel the affair came to be, how I found out, and how I'm dealing with it.

To anyone that has had their world turned upside down by this sad tragedy, I offer my deepest sympathy to you. Maybe together we can muddle through the "recovery" process.

Till next time....

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